when to back off
Posted Mar 2, 2011 by anonymous | 79 views | 0 comments
My husband and i just moved last week. I'am shot and just want to be left alone to get my stuff together and you would think that your friends and family would know this,NO. I think that knowone gives it a thought as they call to tell you that thay are around the block. I can't belive that thay couldn't wait till we were done getting our selfs together.It pissed me off.I don't want to have to run around the house and find places to shove my stuff till i can get to putting it were it needs to be.I was ready for a nap.I hate that in order not to look like a bitch i put my self through this shit.Why do the people who know the stuff i went through to get my butt out of that rat hole town that i lived in understand that i need to regroup my brain.That town and its nasty people hurt me. I don't look at people the same as i did.My husband says that i have changed and that he thinks i should talk to someone.I don't want to talk to anyone. I'am hurt bottom line,and only i can get over it or not.For three years i ate other peoples shit knowing that in my heart i was the good person and all i wanted was to belong,but i got tired and i moved,i feel like i gave up and i never do that so i am upset with myself. In church today i thought i was getting over the pain i was feeling about the woman i know who did this stuff to me,but as i sit here i can see i 'am not.I know it sounds dum but if i could go one on one with her i would be a happy ass. My thoughts are not good ones and i know Jesus is not happy with them and that hurts to cause i hate to disapoint him.I'am to forgive and i don't i wan't her to have my pain so she never ever hurts anyone again and i know thats wrong.I don,t want to be wrong.I don't want to be wrong.HAD ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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