I won't say who it was that abused me when I was a little boy. I'm not ready about that, but I'll write about it some day. It was a family member and I still love him more than anything in the world. I love him more than my own wife. I don't know why. It's beyond reason. I'm not into guys at all. I literally have zero interest that way, but if this man wanted to take me back into his bed now and do all the nasty things he did to me as a kid, I'd do it in a second, I really would. I'd give him hot French kisses like I used to. I'd suck his cock all day long if he wanted and let him cum in my mouth like he used to. He could fuck me for as long and as hard as he liked, even get a little rough like he used to. He could even take me tied up if he wanted. (I knew he liked that sort of thing sometimes.) It's like his intense, incestuous love is imprinted on my body. I still get turned on every time I recall this or that little thing that I experienced so intensely while he was abusing me. I did everything for him. Hand jobs. Hot kisses. Oral sex (lots and lots of that). Facials. Anal sex. And I remember enjoying it, intensely, even the stuff that kind of hurt, or was uncomfortable, or difficult to handle due to my size. Every time he ejaculated in my red mouth, for instance, he'd have his cock shoved deep into my pale face and I felt like choking, but I felt a deep sense of satisfaction and accomplishment when I was able to swallow most of his copious cum while the rest pulsed from my warm, wet lips. It was hot and yummy. I loved the taste of his cum in a strange, curious way. Kind of salty and pungent, and made my little head drunk and dizzy in a pleasant way. Most of all, I could feel his pleasure merging with my sensuous mouth, my delicate hands, and plump, round ass. It wasn't even like I was a boy or girl when we were having sex. It didn't matter. I wanted to please him more than anything in the world and I still do to this day. I loved him, and I wanted to prove my love for him every time I got into his bed. I didn't mind at all. I still don't. I have no desire now to suck other men and let them fuck me silly, just my special childhood lover.