For the last 8 years, I've found financially vulnerable young women and manipulatively convinced them to try prostitution. I never use the word prostitution, I talk about being a generous man looking for an "arrangement," offer them "$2000 per month" (which ends up being $150 per meeting, I pay them that once and never call again). I don't do this for sex with cute young women... I do it to torture them. I deliberately act as degrading as possible in bed, and I deliberately use the word "prostitute" once I've had sex with them. In an innocent way, "Oh, I've never been a girl's first prostitution experience" -- I get off on the emotional suffering. I often get them to do things they would never do in their personal lives because of the obligation they feel because of the payment -- I ejaculate on the face of almost every girl, and many of them have never permitted that before and call it degrading. I enjoy the facials most intensely when the girl hates them the most and is wincing throughout -- when they grunt for a towel afterwards, I say I'll go get you one, and take a deliberately long time so I can watch their agony on camera later. I secretly videotape all of the sexual encounters with a small camera. Then, I follow these girls on Facebook with a fake account, or look up their phone number on Intelius or Radaris, and then after a few years have passed I share evidence of their prostitution with their family, friends, or significant others. I share some of the evidence such as the postings on the online prostitution site (I rarely share video since it's evidence of me committing a crime more serious than soliciting) . The problem is that I enjoy doing this. I called a very Catholic mother of a young woman on SeekingArrangement.com and listened to the mother cry. I told her I was a good Samaritan who did this to save girls, I didn't tell her that I was the first man who fucked her daughter for money. I am tormenting a mother of two children by threatening to bring down her whole family over about 3 months of $250/hr prostitution she did two years ago. I love the power, the feeling of squashing a person's happiness under my thumb. I've stopped fucking other women now that I'm in a serious relationship but I have a backlog of about 60 young women whose lives I can destroy, and I do. I'm not sure how I can stop. I've tried to talk to a therapist but couldn't sit in front of a man face to face who lives in my city and tell him that I do this. I ended up talking to him about other stuff for about 6 months and it helped me a lot. But I can't tell anyone about this in person. I came into the session ready to tell him and couldn't.