Why do I think about him?
Posted Jul 23, 2011 by anonymous | 309 views | 3 comments
HE was my first boyfriend. He lived in Hawaii and visited his grandparents occasionally in Washington. We wrote letters because there was no email then. It was an easy relationship. No teen angst, so easy to be with. Rare at that age. Of course looking back, the burden of life was lighter than it is now. We lost touch. Inevitable, I suppose. Tired of being alone and without a clear idea of where my life was going, I married a man who seemed to have a plan. I think I was hoping to tag along. 18 years, a mortgage, and 2 children later, I am the one who supports the family and I feel used up. Tired. I love my kids but still I wonder about my choice. Now HE is here visiting family. He doesn't call of course, but I hear he has inquired about me. I think about him. I wonder what life would have been like if I had kept him close.
Commented Aug 28, 2011 by anonymous
You lost out so what ! Get over it you idiot !
Commented Jul 25, 2011 by alex
I like this anonymous comments :) +1
Commented Jul 23, 2011 by anonymous
You're not alone. We've all dreamt about the 'what ifs' but you have to accept that the 'would of, should of, could of'' died a long time ago. It's okay to romanticize about the past and if it causes no harm, why not look him up and say hello? But you 2 broke up, lost touch for a reason and you married your husband for a reason. Don't lose sight of that. Appreciate what you've got. To pretend that it would be any better with your ex is just that - pretend.Live for the now and not the past.