tired
Posted Oct 28, 2012 by anonymous | 268 views | 2 comments
I'm so tired, tired of putting in the effort. I know that I have such an amazing opportunity to graduate with a four year degree but I'm tired of pretending that I'm ready, pretending that I care, pretending that I can do it anymore. I'm sure I'm not the first to wish that I could just run away, leave with my boyfriend and start over in a brand new city. I would never sever ties with mine or his family, just ties with particular friends. I'm exhausted from dealing with and solving all of their problems. When did I allow all of this to happen? When did I decide that it was ok for everyone to use me as their handkerchief. I am more than happy to be someone's shoulder every now and again but it's become so routine that I don't know how to separate myself from it all. Leaving seems like the best idea at this point, but I know that I would always regret not finishing my program. Does it get better from here? Does becoming an adult help at all? Sometimes I feel so much more mature than my friends. Maybe it's because I was forced to grow up quickly and depend largely on myself. I just want someone to say that things will get better, that come May I won't be chained to this any longer. Is it wrong to say that I would be okay leaving a certain group of people behind forever? That if my boyfriend proposed to me tomorrow and asked me to leave the country with him I would? I know my life isn't that hard and that people are faced with far worse challenges everyday. I, like most, just want the dream. I want my wishes to come true.
Commented Nov 27, 2012 by anonymous
This wesbite makes things hella easy.
Commented Oct 29, 2012 by anonymous
May your dreams come true dear.