My boyfriend said something to me last night, that has kept my stomach tense all day today. He showed me a hint of fear. He's a very practical man, very diplomatic, always telling me that I worry too much and such like that, calling me a pessimist. So when he starts thinking the way I do, something is wrong. He suggested that we invest in a shotgun and a rifle, possibly a handgun too. I was shocked, I said 'Why?' When he didn't answer, I cautioned a guess. Just in case the country dips into choas and anarchy and the states initialize martial law. I don't know how much of a chance we have of that happening, I tried to smile when he said that. But it scared me. It scared me cus he thinks that there might be a chance that there might be martial law at some point soon. I'm not afraid of dying, not at all, but I'm afraid of coping out and just letting it happen. I'm afraid of martial law, I'm afraid of choas where people are running the streets, looting, raping, and killing. My man even suggested we start going to the range in town to practice shooting. It makes me so uneasy. I am not saying it is going to happen, I'm just saying, I was scared by the fact that my baby thinks it is. My confession is that I'm terrified by what could possibly happen in my country. This is just beyond me that my man would be thinking this way. I think it was spurred by the fact that I am keeping a headline journal of war times, and I have been joking (bad humor, I admit) that we're all gonna die cus our president is an imperialist and nuttier than a squirell turd, so it might be my fault that he is thinking this way. Who knows, not me. I know this post is going to really insult some Bush supporters, but let me speak my piece, and don't go off the deep end if you comment, cus if you belittle me or curse at me, I will jump down your throat and you will choke on me. That's my disclaimer. Feel free to disagree but don't be mean.