Only a Mother Understands My girl friend and I are both university students. I am 21-years old, studying the physical sciences, and she is 20-years old and studying the social sciences. We met in the campus library while looking for reference material and have been going steady for some time. We enjoy each other’s company and have similar interests. We are both straight (sexually) and conservative in our ways. We come from ordinary middle-class families that uphold the traditional values of sexuality and morality. Lately, we have been discussing sex and she makes a big thing out of her being a virgin. She cherishes the fact that she has deferred sex until she feels that she is mature enough to deal with any emotional complications that might arise. She told me that she has had casual relationships with the opposite sex in the past but they have never led to sexual intimacy. I told her that I have never had a lover, meaning that I have never had sex with anyone that I love in a romantic context. I added that when I am sexually aroused, I simply masturbate to obtain sexual pleasure and release. Both statements are true but she mistakenly concluded that I have never had sex with anyone, i.e., that I am a virgin. In fact, this is ALMOST the case, but not quite. I have a dark secret and I feel compelled to reveal to her, but I doubt if she will understand. When I was 16-years old, I had a sexual encounter with my mother. Details now are a bit vague but I’ll try to recall them. Late one evening, my mother and I were home alone. My father was away on one of his many trips trying to drum up support for launching his own small business. These trips were common and he would be gone for days. I’m sure my mother was lonely during his absences. She had gone to bed early but was unable to fall sleep. Being somewhat of an insomniac, she tried sleeping medication but it didn’t seem to work. So she asked me to do something that has always worked before. She asked me to brush her hair in bed, hoping that it would relax her enough so she would fall asleep. I agreed and did what she wanted. But It was chilly in her bedroom and I was only wearing pajama bottoms, so I decided to warm up by getting under her blankets and lying next to her warm body. I had done this before and she never complained. In any case, she was wearing a nightgown and it covered her body. She gradually began to doze off and fell asleep. In the past, I had just darkened the lights in her room and left. This time the situation was different. When she had called me, I had been masturbating in my bedroom and I still felt horny. I was sexually aroused by something a friend had told me earlier. He said that he had seen his mother completely naked as she was leaving the shower. She hadn’t expected to encounter anyone and therefore hadn’t covered herself. He said that he saw her “tits” from so close that he could have touched them. They were large, beautifully shaped and they jiggled as she walked. Her nipples were dark brown and they just stuck out from her tits. Lower down, he saw her huge patch of dark-brown pubic hair that covered her crotch. Neither said anything as they passed by one another, but his mother had to have sensed that he was enormously aroused by her nudity. But what really excited me was when he said that he cannot get these images out of his mind and that he wonders what it would be like to be sexually intimate with her in bed. As I was lying next to my sleeping mother, I thought about what my friend had said and I was becoming more and more aroused by it. My mother wasn’t that attractive but she did have a nice body. She was quite stocky and she certainly had a large bust that always caught my eye. I had never really lusted for her in the past but now I was becoming excited by the prospect of sexually touching her. I had never done this before but now I really wanted to. With my heart pounding, I pulled off my pajama bottoms and underpants and began masturbating my penis. I slipped my hand down the top of her nightgown and ran my hand over her breasts. They really were large and soft and I played with her nipples until they became hard. I then went to her feet end, pulled up her nightgown and slid my hands up and down her legs. They were so soft, warm and smooth as glass. As my hands reached upward to her thighs and crotch, I felt pubic hair and realized that she was not wearing any panties. I knew then that I was not going to stop at fondling, that I had the opportunity to go “all the way” with her and that I was going to take it. So I began spreading her legs wide apart and then, checking that she was still asleep, raised one leg and bent it at the knee so I could pull my crotch tightly up against hers. My penis was now almost touching her genitals and I moistened it with saliva so it would slip easily into her vagina. I could feel that her vaginal opening was closed, so I moistened and rubbed her vaginal slit in preparation for entering her. I gradually inserted my penis and when I could not penetrate her any deeper, instinct took hold and I began to pump rhythmically, slowly at first but gradually faster and faster. The bedsprings were creaking and with the movement of my body, I realized that my mother was beginning to wake up. She was making moaning sounds every time I penetrated her deeply and she was trying to synchronize the movement of her body with mine. This continued briefly until I finally reached my climax and ejaculated sperm into her. She then closed her eyes, lay motionless and fell asleep. The next morning my mother asked me what happened last night. She said that she has a vague recollection of it but would like me fill in the gaps. She wasn’t angry or anything, but she was serious. I was extremely embarrassed and basically said that I was horny last night and “did things to you” that I probably should not have done. She said, “Sweety, you have to be careful when you do things like that to your mother. I am still fertile and can conceive and when you inseminate me, I can become pregnant. Then I would have to have an abortion. Besides, when a son has sexual intercourse with his mother, that is incest and it is still a bit of a social taboo. We’ll just keep it to ourselves, but your father must NEVER find out that we are having intercourse. Whereas I understand that you are simply trying to explore sex with me, and that it is not uncommon for a son to have intercourse with his mother at least once, as I have read, he would never understand. With that final comment, my mother gave me a big hug and said not to worry about it any further. Anonymous