my life is ruined at only 15
Posted Mar 1, 2012 by anonymous | 767 views | 9 comments
my mother passed away from breast cancer when i was 11. my father is now in jail for making some bad financial decisions after she died. my brother is all i have left and he's barley scraping by with his job all the way across the country. my dad didn't leave enough money to pay any bills so i had to leave my house and live at "family friends" who i'm just now finding out secretly hate my whole family. they called my brother an "arrogant shit" to my face, and then called me an ungrateful brat for something that they didn't even have the whole story for. by the time i can go back and visit my house, it might be foreclosed on for all i know; meaning i lose everything i've ever owned and that's important to me, including my mother's prized possessions. i'm moving from place to place, unable to trust anyone and receiving the backlash of my dad's bad decisions. i've missed so much school that i might be held back. i can't tell my friends what's going on, and i've been so depressed that they're so worried about me which hurts even more because they can't know. they just can't. i've had to grow up way too fast and i can't handle it sometimes. i have anxiety attacks every night, i cry all day and every day, it's just too hard. i always think about other 15 year olds, and how all they have to worry about it grades, sports, and what parties to go to on the weekends. i have to worry about where i'm gonna live, if i have to skip lunch in school for a month in order to pay the water bill to have a shower, whether my dad is okay in that horrifying jail. my brother cares so much and i want to live with him, but he's struggling already and i wouldn't want to make it worse for him. i don't have any other close relatives, either. i feel way too alone all the time. i've thought about killing myself multiple times, but the thought of leaving my brother and dad to grieve is even more painful. i just don't know what to do, how to handle anything, or whether to even bother to think that things will get better. i have too much to handle and i've only been alive 15 years.
Commented Oct 3, 2012 by anonymous
Pray and ask God to guide u in this difficult time. Its better u suffer now then at old age u can still improved u self. Making reading and play games to keep u fit and knowledgeable. Learn to be patience people can say all kinds of thing that u should just let it pass u ear dont have to explain replay them.
Commented May 24, 2012 by anonymous
my parents both passed away when i was 12 in a car accident i was stressed and i had to do everything myself. i felt all alone in the world like there was no one to help me. i am 22 now but when i was younger i wanted and attempted to kill myself on multiple occasions and you know what. im glad i didnt. life may be terrible but you need to make the most of it. dont take your life. its not worth it.
Commented Mar 5, 2012 by anonymous
you're fifteen. you have at least another 45 years left. you have nothing but a lifetime of chances in front of you. and why are you paying water bills if you aren't living anywhere permanently? the water bills in your old house would have been in your parents name and aren't your responsibility. if you want to live with your brother but don't want to be a burden, get a job. i had one at your age because my parents were poor. didn't do me any harm. as for your dad being in jail, well i know he was grienving and all but as an adult and a parent you learn to suck it up and be responsible for the people who are in your care.
Commented Mar 3, 2012 by anonymous
The man who originally said 'what does not kill you only makes you stronger' was ironically spoken by Nietzsche. The man was stricken with (what we believe to be) some form of syphilis, which left him essentially out of his mind for the last ten years of his life. SO depending on HOW YOU REACT to what doesn't kill you you may get stronger or weaker. I have good news. There are resources available out there for you such as counseling and Children's Services - if it gets that bad. The guy above is right about how things will seem in 5-10 years especially if you work hard at it. You deserve the happiness that such work yields. Don't fret about the negative comments here. They either don't mean it or are so frustrated with their own lives they want to impose their suffering upon you.
Commented Mar 3, 2012 by anonymous
I hope things get better for you.
Commented Mar 2, 2012 by anonymous
Do not listen to the replies by those idiots. Just remember one thing, what does not kill you only makes you stronger. Yes you are only 15 and you have so many problems but that is not the end of the world. I hope you are in good health so all the rest will solve itself, just be strong and do not give up. I suggest you speak with your brother either have him come back or you go to him, in these hard times it is always better to stick together. Hang on there, you will make it and in 5-10 years you will look back and see that all these hardships that you went through actually made you a stronger and a better person.
Commented Mar 2, 2012 by anonymous
become a craigslist prostitute, that way youd have some money
Commented Mar 2, 2012 by anonymous
honestly your life sounds hopeless. you should just end it all and kill yourself, that is what i would do if i had all your problems. things arent going to get any better
Commented Mar 2, 2012 by anonymous
We all go through trying times is our lives. Often it seems that they come in waves and that we can not bear the burden. But do know that things aren't always going to be this 'heavy', that life will lighten up at some point. I also suggest that you turn to friends, family, your priest/pastor or support groups to help you cope.