My Demon
Posted Sep 13, 2013 by anonymous | 415 views | 5 comments
For some time now I have been battling this demon that has been getting the best of me. Over many years I have secretly hooked up with other men fulfill a sexual desire that I regret and hate myself for after I have the done the sexual act with them. I'm not attracted to men in any way. I don't have a desire to be with a man in any type of serious way but it seems like to fulfill this sexual urge that has feeding off my soul I have the need to be with a guy sexualy just to keep satisfied in which satisfaction turns into disgust and hatred towards myself. This is the first time I have came out openly about my problem and being able to share this finally get it off my chest is a big step towards conquering my demons and freeing myself from this dirty compulsion. I know there maybe people that are in my same situation and there are some that think I should just come out and accept who I am but. Honestly from the bottom of my heart that is not who I am and I know that its just a bad habit that I can kick because of the fact I never feel happy the things I have done after I have done them I never go home and sleep easily I feel so dirty and disgusted with myself that I take showers for hours trying to scrub the guilt that I have off my body which leads me to scrubbing myself to raw skin. I have thought about ending my life to conquer this insanity but I know that's not the right way of handling things so I'm here today laying it all out on the table taking my first step to leaving my dirty demons in the past.
Commented Sep 15, 2013 by anonymous
fake? haha yes we will see who's fake when the time comes and You see him in all his glory then we will see if you can call him fake
Commented Sep 15, 2013 by anonymous
yes you can! no matter what the retards say so just ignore them
Commented Sep 14, 2013 by anonymous
ha ha!! funny,,, a fairy tale story about a dude that ZERO historians of the day ever wrote about. also you might as well promote the book that doesn't have an original or a copy of the original or a copy copy of the original with so called witness prophets born 100 years after the fake dude died.
Commented Sep 13, 2013 by anonymous
I do understand your situation, but the solution and relief from guilt just lie in your hands. The real challenge will be the next time you feel the urge to do it again and you need to be up to that challenge. Try to have sex regularly or even more with your wife or girlfriend. Whenever you get the urge just stick to her at least emotionally.
Commented Sep 13, 2013 by anonymous
you can conquer all Demons thru Jesus Christ