My Complex Life
Posted Dec 15, 2012 by anonymous | 298 views | 3 comments
I was psychologically abused by my mother when i was 17-. she told me i was to save the world someday, took me out of school in 4th grade, never let me go outside to get any friends. She also told me i was a female in a males body, and told me alot of things growing up, like Chocolate Cows were real. i was never truly a child, now im being forced into real life adulthood. I broke free of my mothers grasp when i turned 17. now i am 21. everyone that knows me and all the details to my story are amazed that i turned out 'okay' and that i havent started drugs or tried to kill myself. my confession is: i am not okay. every day of my life i have to face the fact that i, in some shape or form, am mentally handicapped from not having proper schooling. i make stupid mistakes almost all the time. I also feel extremely alone from having no close friends, nor family. Every day i have to face my past. Every night, i cry. Not everyone is as strong as they seem.
Commented Dec 15, 2012 by anonymous
I was emotionally abused, too. In retrospect, I've realized that my parents weren't realy parents at all to me. They just didn't have the skills. They did their best. The good news is that as an adult, I'm learning self-care, essentially learning to parent myself where my own parents failed. I feel like I have an inner child and I'm raising this child myself. I'm learning patience and love. And you can educate youself, really the best sort of education that can last all of your life. Don't give up. I mess up all the time. I've learned to roll with it. I like to think my defects make me a more compassionate person when others fail, and we all do sooner or later. And I feel like the stupidest person in the world sometimes, but there are so many other people doing stupid things, too, I must be in good company.
Commented Dec 15, 2012 by anonymous
i have tried seeing a few therapists, they were all the 'and how did that make you feel?' listen-only type. I don't want to waste my time digging for however long for the 'right' therapist.
Commented Dec 15, 2012 by anonymous
You need a counseling for all these tings set up.