When I was 5 years old, my parents divorced because of an affair my mom had and because my father had a drinking problem. I saw the man my mom left my dad for beat up my dad in our front lawn and it traumatized me. My mom got custody of me and I had to live with her and this new man. I never liked him. He was never loving and always made me feel like I was just baggage that he had to accept so he could be with my mom. Through the years as I was growing up, I never got the love I needed from my mom or this man. Their idea of love was monetary things instead of sitting down with me and talking or bonding in some way. They sent me off every summer for 2 months so I wouldn't be around. As I got older I became rebelious and starting lying and sneaking out at night as well as shoplifted. I grew up in a household of yelling, emotional abuse, name calling, etc.. Wehn I moved out I went off the deep end and messed up a lot resulting in my mom and her husband not speaking to me. Within the past 5 years my life has completely turned for the better. I have settled down, gotten married to a wonderful man, changed my life completely, matured and I have been trying to mend my relationship with my mother. However, she doesn't seem to want a relationship with me, her only daughter. I have written her letters and tried talking to her about how much this means to me and she just gets defensive. I absolutely hate her husband. I always have but I want a relationship with her. She doesn't send me birthday cards or anniversary cards but yet she expects it from me. She lives 25 minutes away, we both own our own businesses and work from home but yet she never has time to come visit or even for lunch. I know this isn't really a confession but I need some advice on what I should do. I am ready to throw in the towel and stop trying to mend the relationship. Someone please help.