IT'S NOT WORTH IT ANYMORE
Posted Mar 2, 2011 by anonymous | 157 views | 0 comments
I hate my husband. I pretend to be supportive of him while he flounders around, trying to get his business going, but really I wish he would just get a real fucking job. We spent all the settlement money in a little over a month, and I hate myself and him for it. I don't know what happened, or where it all went, but we are back in the same shitty situation we've been in for the past seven years and I'm just sick of it. And then there's the withdrawal... don't get me started. This is just another excuse for him to lay around and ignore his family, surf the internet on that fucking evil piece of shit laptop, and generally act like his life sucks so fucking bad. Well, he doesn't have a clue what it's like for life to suck. He's not stuck at home all day with two kids, hoping that they won't get wise to the fact that we don't go outside because I am too depressed to step out into the sunshine- not because it's too fucking hot. I can't wake up. I don't want to go to sleep. I wear the same clothes for days on end because I can't bring myself to do laundry. I am crushingly bored all day long, and I just don't want to live anymore. I want to die, to escape this mundane bullshit life, my apathetic husband. I wasn't meant to do this. This isn't how it was supposed to be. I was supposed to be successful, important. I want to commit suicide, but I don't want to leave my kids here with their lameass fuckface of a father.
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