I really don't know how to make this confession or where to start, but I think the title says it all. I'm 16 years old, and before you guys start assuming that I've been molested or raped, I want to set the record straight, my father has NEVER touched me in any inappropriate way ever. My daddy was young when he knocked up my mom. They were both 14 when my mom got pregnant, and I remember growing up with my grandparents for the two three years of my life. My mom and dad were still so young and it wasnt until they were 16 that I began to live with them. Ever since I can remember I was a daddy's girl. I loved both my parents and they eventually got married at 18 and had another child, my little brother. Life with my parents got pretty sucky, they were always fighting, my mom was cheating on my dad with some guy from work and by the time i was 13 they got divorced. Both my brother and I wanted to live with our dad when they got divorced, and a couple years later he got married again to my step mom and I hate her. She's a mean bitch and we don't get along. My dad is 30 now and I developed an attraction towards him by age 13. Three years have passed and these feelings are only getting more intense. My father is incredibly attractive, I cant even have my girlfriends over because they flirt with my dad non stop and it makes me jealous and mad. He works out a lot and it doesnt help that i have a very young father. He's only 14 years older than me, so sometimes I feel it's the age gap maybe that makes me feel more attracted to him. My dad looks like Brad Pitt's twin, but with darker hair. My step mom is the meanest bitch, she acts nice around my dad and when hes not around she always bitches at me. On my 16th birthday I decided to make attempts to seduce my father, get closer to him and change our relationship. I even thought about my motives, am I doing this to get my step mom out of the picture? truth be told, YES but also because ive been in love with him forever now. I havent lost my virginity yet, but I often fantasize losing it to my dad. He is complete candy for the eyes and whatever I do, I cant get myself to see him as some "old dad". Sometimes I cry because I'm in love with him and want him kissing me, and laying in bed next to ME instead of that bitch. My relationship with my mom is fucked up. She started drinking after the divorce and made no attempt to be there for me and my bro so I rarely see her. I havent told anyone about this but something happened last week between my dad and I. I was having a rough day, and was in a depressed mood. I spent the majority of my evening isolating myself in my room. My step mom kept screaming at me for not "finishing chores" i really wish i had a lock but that bitch forbid locks on my door. i usually just drown out her nagging voice with music, IPOD ftw! but yea anyway, this went on for about an hour until she physically put her hands on me. I kept ignoring her so she knocked over all my books and glass snow globes my father had bought me through the years. This seriously broke my heart and i jumped off the bed, seeing red like a bull and i attacked her. I tackled her down on the ground, pulling her hair, screaming I HATE YOU! BITCH! and before I know it, my dad comes in and pulls me off my step mom. hes furious with me and im in tears trying to explain what she did. I point at the broken snow globes on the floor and that bitch is silent. She makes the excuse of saying "I made her do it". but my dad has this look on his face, as if that bitch just stabbed a knife in his chest. He leaves the room with her and i break down crying. I seriously felt like no one gives a damn about my, or my feelings, especially my dad. But its not long before I hear them yelling and screaming from their bedroom "YOU SPOIL HER TOO MUCH! SHE NEEDS DISCIPLINE!" "DONT TELL ME HOW TO RAISE MY DAUGHTER!" it went on and on back and forth like that until she finally left the house. I knew she left because that bitch Eva slammed the door so loud it almost made the house shake. I was a little afraid I would get yelled out by my dad when he finally entered my room, but all he did was sit next to me and open his arms. i cried and was crying surprisingly loud, sort of embarassing but he held me and comforted me and I think it just made me cry even more because being in his arms was a sweet torture. I wanted more, i felt overwhelmed with sexual tension, and love and hurt and anger, ugh it sucked. It was almost dinner time, so my dad offered to cheer me up and cook for me and my bro. I was in the kitchen with him and i was slowly cheering up, he kept makiing me laugh, my dad has the most wicked sense of humor and when he smiles, seriously makes me weak in the knees. It was the first time I was daring enough to flirt with him, and it seemed like he was flirting back. I kept complimenting his incredible shape and i even confessed about my gf problems, but i didnt tell him that it made me jealous. When he was cutting some peppers for our pasta, i was tempted to just wrap my arms around his flawless waist from behind and hug him, so I did. and he seemed to jolt a bit at first but relaxed and laughed it off "someone misses me."i remember him say and i just breathed him in and hugged him for as long as possible before he had to move. Dinner went by incredibly well without the prescence of that bitch who thankfully wasnt home yet and my bro went to sleep around 10. I wasnt ready to sleep just yet so my dad asked me if i wanted to watch a movie with him, a tradition we used to do on the weekends. and i was soooo excited because this was my opportunity to try and get closer to him. So i decided to grab a blanket and when i returned he had already popped in Volume One of the God father into the dvd player (one of our favorite movies) and i asked him if we could lay down on the sofa together like we used to when i was a kid. He seemed to freeze a bit but then said sure. My heart was beating a mile a minute but he laid down behind me on the sofa and then i manoeuvred myself in front, like a spooning position. I pulled the blanket over us and felt his arm wrap around my waist. I moved back further into him so that my back was flush against his chest and we cuddled while the movie played. We stayed like this for an hour because I was too chicken to try anything else. But i decided to try something. I twisted my body around and faced him. He pulled his eyes away from the TV screen immediately and looked at me. I began to ask him if I'm beautiful, a series of insecure questions girls my age usually ask themselves and he caressed my face and hair and told me that he's so proud of my beauty, so proud to know that he created a life that is the most beautiful on the planet. and I swear i just wanted to kiss him right then and there but i didnt. i was still getting over the shock of his compliments, i smiled and kissed his cheek, hugging him closest to me, and he rubbed my back reassuring me that i dont need to worry about my looks. and then i was stupid enough to ask him; "If you werent my father, would you ask me out? would you kiss me?" and then he gave me the weirdest look and told me not to ask him these things, that he is my dad and he cant answer that question. oh my god i wanted to die, and i began to tear up for some fucked up reason. it was really starting to piss me off that i was getting so emotional and he noticed it. his tone of voice became more soft and he held the side of my cheek and asked me whats wrong, while i chocked up on more tears. I really began to worry him because he grabbed the remote and paused the film, and was about to sit up when I just went for it. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled his lips down on mine. I kissed him. full on the mouth. His lips were finally pressed against mine and it was pure ecstasy on my part. My body was on fire and I was incredibly wet. I wanted to deepen the kiss but he pulled back just a bit to catch his breath and look at me. he said my name and asked me why i did that, that it was wrong and that i need to sit up because he wanted to get off the sofa. As much as the rejection hurt, something told me to keep trying. I tell him no, and i kiss him again on the mouth, deeper and with more desire than before and he's fighting my affections, sitting up, but i sit up with him and sit in his lap, straddling him while he struggles to push me off while lip locked with me. but im relentless and i dont give up and i swear he gave up and wrapped his arms around my waist, surrendering when we heard the front door open, the bitch was home and i jumped off his lap while he stood up and collected himself. I decided to remove myself from the situation, cuz i wasnt in the mood to see her nasty face but ever since that kiss, things have been awkward between my dad and i, hes been avoiding me, he hugs me weird, he doesnt let me hug him long anymore, he avoids driving me to school and picking me up, he avoids kissing my cheek goodnight, its seriously hurting me! I dont know what to do. I love him so much, I wish he loved me the same, why is he treating me like this? I'm so in love with him, I really want to sleep with him.