I'm probably going insane...
Posted Sep 9, 2013 by anonymous | 327 views | 0 comments
My life has been screwed up and messed with by people of general schools and just by older people in general. I grew up from getting messed up for talking to people, made fun of because i was alot of things, except worthless, and no one generally liked me, though there were few that did. Now i've grown up to be what people call a leader, a man above men for the ways that i act. The truth is though, i hate it. I hate every single person who thinks their my friend, and even the ones i don't know. I put on a smile everyday with eyes wide open, knowing no one will notice. I wanted to grow strong before, strong enough so i could crush everyone who felt they were superior to me, to crush humanity for being selfish, greedy, corrupt, and for all the stupidity of our arguments. But now that i'm as "Strong" as i am, i feel so broken, so lonely. No one can just look at me and tell me, "I know your pain" but it's impossible in a society of people who only judge. I know i'm a guy and all but it all isn't fair. None of it is. I just want to be accepted, but thats impossible. I just want to be loved, but thats impossible too. I just don't know anymore, and it scares me. I can't help but wonder when will my mind stop deteriorating and i can be happy or at least sane? And don't say talk to my family, their just as human as everyone else, thinking that so long as they themselves as an individual, are ok, then i'm just being stupid. They don't know i've felt this way for 4 years...
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