I lost my a few months ago... I deeply regret it. I was a girl who promoted purity of the body and soul. I wore a purity ring and intended on waited til i was married. Then I went to college. I was stressed out my mom and i have a horrid relationship she almost tried to kill me, my Dad was missing in my life ... I had no one but I thought I was strong. I felt alone. I didnt even have a bestfirend to turn to anymore and I had my heart stepped on twice in the same season. Then He came along.. He was so different and just wonderful. He reminded me alot of me. I loved that . two weeks before school was out we started hanging out . On the first night he kissed me in a way i had never been kissed before and touched me in places i had never been touched. I push him away and say stop but he wouldn't . He tried to take off my ring. He tried to have sex with me. It really offended me but i was lonely and starving fo love and affection. I hung around him and his friends 24/7 almost. We all became great friends. He promised me that we'd never go all the way. We could go half way. I became comfortable with that. He made me think I was his girlfriend. He's say slick things that would hint that everything was known and could be left unsaid. I thought we were together. So he kept asking me to stay over I finally did. It was april 25th about 3 or 4 am. I trusted him too easily though there were signsthat pointed to NO! we did the halfway thing but i guess it was enough for him. He arranged his self so that he'd be able to push into me.It hurt so bad. I pushed him away and he asked if I wanted him to stop. I said clearly yeah! it's going too far! he said are you sure. I said yes again. And he pushed harder into me.... it was too late. I wanted to cry. I felt like i had fallen into a trap and i was embarassed because i had gotten myself into this situation. ....I had said no... Why didn't he stop? After he was done, he wanted to cuddle. a few tears fell down my eyes and I took off my broken promise to my savior, but I couldn't really cry because I should't have been there in his bed. It's my own fault. I asked him befroe he fell asleep did you know this was gonna happen. He said no. As i've come to learn I was not his girlfriend. He had one and i found out form his friends. He's heartless.... We keep in touch and meet up a few times more. This encounter with him has left me bitter and permanently hurt. Everyday I think about it. How come someone be so heartless to someone who was as innocent as me. I didn't know it could be like this. It hurts.. bad I hope this will be a message to anyone who reads this. I don't want any women to feel this pain. ther eis no pain in the word like unrequited love and abandonment. I'm sorry I broke my promise world I only hop My Lord will forgive for my sins.