
I hate myself and want to die
Posted Nov 3, 2014 by anonymous | 1019 views | 53 comments
This is real, I honestly don't care what the jerks wads out there think about this because it freaking people like you that brought me to this. Now to the other people who just want to listen, hi I'm at the end of my rope here, I cannot deal with life, or the people in it or myself and all the guilt any longer. I've tried ignoring mean people who won't accept me, I've tried changing myself to try and fit in I've tried being myself, but nothing works it always leaves me feeling alienated and alone like its all my fault or whatever then those people wonder why I don't want to be around them. My family is no help eatheir none of them understand or accept me and my style and the fact that IM JUST NOT LIKE THEM!!!!!!!! any way I've been depressed for a long time I've got no body, I've had no help, my parents want me to talk to the pastor instead of a shrink but I keep telling them I'm not religious he won't want to listen and he has a life too, a sad and demented one, but a life, but heck my life is sad and demented too. I cut my legs, and I thread my wrists, no body knows but the people whom read this posts, I thought of telling my mom but who knows what she would do, sertantly not find me help that I need. Well, it feels good to tell all of this here. I tried an over dose once,, it didn't work, I ended up shaking and throwing up.. I'm not sure what to do. as soon as I'm able to leave I'm getting help, if I haven't burnt out yet.
Commented Nov 26, 2014 by anonymous
Suicide Crisis Center 1-800-SUICIDE - National Hope Network Toll-Free, 24/7 hotline for emergency suicide information 1-800-999-9999 - Covenant House 1-800-850-8078 - The Travor HelpLine - Specializing in gay and lesbian youth suicide prevention
Commented Nov 26, 2014 by Savanna
And yes, I wound up without a Mom anyway, but I do have a brother.
Commented Nov 26, 2014 by Savanna
I don't know if you are reading this but don't kill yourself, OK, look, I don't know what people have done to you, OK, but trust me when I say, you don't want to die, I've been there before, my house burnt down when I was 8 and my Mom died of cancer when I was 11, and my Dad put me up for adoption shortly after Mom died because he didn't want me to be without a Mom, please don't kill yourself, I don't know you, I don't know whats going on in your life, but please, think, please don't kill yourself, what ever you are upset about please let it go.
Commented Nov 24, 2014 by anonymous
Just remember, there are always people that care
Commented Nov 24, 2014 by anonymous
You can have everything but nothing at the same time
Commented Nov 23, 2014 by anonymous
Hump the corner of a desk.
Commented Nov 23, 2014 by anonymous
I have been though abuse my whole life. Im 12 i have lived with my grandmother and step grandfather since i was 2 because my mubut m is mentally ill and takes drugs. I feel like im dumb and that nobody likes me. But, i have so many things to live for! Focus on the positive things after all you were given this life because you were strong enough to live it! Dont worry nobodys perfect! Ive just put that aside and keep on going, but isnt cutting the thing where you basically slice youself!? Do not do that please!!!! Stay with us, you will be just fine just hold on for now, maybe go outside or do something you love. Also tell your mum can help. Imagine how your parents would feel if you killed yourself? That would be horrible, somebodys own daughter or son killing themselves. God believes in you even if you dont believe in him he loves you when you think nobody else does, he sees and hears everything you do and every move you take. Jesus sacrificed his life for the sin of others. Bless you please dont go :( ๐๐๐๐
Commented Nov 21, 2014 by anonymous
:( I suggest my Get an appointment for consulling/ extreme consulling post ~!@#$*---{} ABBY MAY**10**
Commented Nov 21, 2014 by anonymous
I'm not sure if this is still being viewed or monitored by the original poster, but I just wanted to say that no matter what, don't take your own life. I have gone through depression and self image issues for many years. It got ramped up after one of my friends thought they fucked up his life and shot himself. He figured nobody would remember him, no one would care, but guess what? Everybody cared. I still think about him everyday, not a day goes by where I don't think about him and the future he could if made for himself. After he committed suicide that made my own depression worse and I always had the thought of suicide right there.. I came so close do doing it, even had the gun in my hand multiple times, but I just couldn't do it, I knew that it would devastate my family if that happened. So.. I just stuck it out, continually getting worse, my mind always stuck with the prospect of suicide. I could never escape that little voice that constantly told me to just end it here and now.. one day I decide that it was time to just do it so I decided to write letters to my family and one friend that I knew vs red about me. The letters were filled with the cherished memories I had with them, and I started thinking about how even though it was bad and how much I just hated myself, who I was, or the person I would become, I couldn't just give up, I had to struggle it out here. This place may be scuttlebutt hey, you only get one shot. I never was one for therapist and what not.. my therapy was writing those letters and burning them, I guess to me seeing my reason for wanting to kill myself burn into flames seemed to release some of the burdens of depression. I just wanted to say that many people go through the same thing as you, some make the choice and there is no reset button. Just stick it out, you have control of what you make of your future, turn it into something you want. Confide in somebody you really trust, write. Oh and getting out and doing something to keep your mind occupied helps.. just focus on the positive, life gets better! -- peace outโ remember people actually do care and love you!
Commented Nov 19, 2014 by anonymous
But, if you die you will never find meaning. We all have a purpose in life, some we just don't realize
Commented Nov 19, 2014 by anonymous
Don't listen to them, and what do I do at school when I'm angry, I tell the, to shut up, and I has no room in my life for their negetivity, and walk off if that doesn't work I slap them, if they threten me, I simply say hey ou see that girl over there, when they turn to look I grab their wrist twist it ick them and walk off don't kill yourself, don't run away, ignore those who are mean, they are simply full of anger, and nger is the enemy, patience, self control and love is our friends, they make us shine brighter, have hope, and help us be happy, and makes us stronger then anyone who is mean to us or is angry. if you want to talk, let me know.
Commented Nov 19, 2014 by anonymous
Life has no meaning, it's up to you to find any meaning. If you can't, then it's time to die.
Commented Nov 17, 2014 by anonymous
Go talk to the pastor. Even if you aren't religious, he can still understand what you feel, and maybe make things better.
Commented Nov 17, 2014 by anonymous
I think I will do rhat
Commented Nov 17, 2014 by anonymous
Thank you
Commented Nov 17, 2014 by anonymous
I'm a girl, idiot, and I am in no way racist you are correct I am a punk, I have a punk grunge band. I don't even believe you are African American, I know plenty they are much kinder than you, are and let me bring it to your attention, you have some stuff or what the hell are you typing the comment from?
Commented Nov 17, 2014 by anonymous
I don't have friends, I don't even have a phone, not that I want one cuz I don't . No one even knows I'm hurting, I've never told anyone until this post, and I see what people think and I will never tell anyone ever again. Why do you have to be so cruel what did I ever do yo you? I don't want sympathy , I just want understanding, and in sure as heck don't want you to treat me as dirt I do that enough myself. You don't know me you have never met me you have no hair splitting idea of what I am going through you don't know how I feel, I've never uttered the word suicide to anyone besides my diary so be quiet before you insult the daylight out of people and then their deaths become added to your bad karma.oh wait I just realized what happened! You wherent making fun of me, this was your confession! Oh honey you mistaked the confessions box for the comment box you poor little dummy! Again I will say live a day in my life, live a week in my life, then you can judge come back you will be singing a different song, And these children that you spit on as they are trying to change their lives, they are immune to your insults, and are very aware of what they go through. The world suck because people aren't true. Man learn to not be an a$$hole.
Commented Nov 17, 2014 by anonymous
I am a Caucasian 16y/o girl
Commented Nov 13, 2014 by anonymous
You should seriously write a letter with all you have to say about it, about you feel and see life. And be really authentic, it's important. And then, show the letter to someone you were near to when your life was better. Sister, brother, Aung, grandma, mon, sas (usualy, even if we dont think So, family cares, you would be surprised), or friends, teacher, people you work with. Maybe you will choose the wrong person, and he/she won't be able to help you, but dont never give up. People that care, will at least try for you. Make them feel your pain. It's important to be written and not spoken at the first place because the people will read it entirely before, without speaking while you're trying to explain. And they will read it, when they will have the time and be all yours, listening to you, your feelings about your life.
Commented Nov 13, 2014 by anonymous
Just ignore the bad comments. Some people has to be mean to people to feel powerful.
Commented Nov 12, 2014 by anonymous
You dont Understand what is going on here and you say that, well that's fair a person who doesnt know how to get help is finally crying out for help and you say Im more Important Im different so I have it worse, this is the God Damn 21st Century no one gives a fuck what race you are,You know Black And White people think like you do have ignorant minds that only lead to more racism and prejudices, So do you really believe that a person wanting to know that there are good people left in world is a bad thing, And I felt the same way as that person once but I realized I just need ONE, Just ONE person to believe there is hope for me and that is enough , but its assholes llike you make humanity Dumber than it already is
Commented Nov 12, 2014 by anonymous
Go ahead and jump off a cliff and do us all a favor you punk pussy ass muthafucka. One thing I can't stand is a little pussy ass white boy complaining about Shit when you dont have to go through half the Shit us colored folk go through, you got a roof over your head, clothes on your back and parents that give a shit about you and you on here crying like a sissy ass bitch smmfh
Commented Nov 11, 2014 by anonymous
I'm sad I'm depressed WAH! Nobody understands me! I have a house I have friends I have everything I need to survive and probably more! WAH my friends don't like me! WAH my mom is mean to me! WAH my dad is mean to me! WAH I wanted the galaxy not the iPhone 6 WAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH I HAVE SO MANY BAD THING IN MY LIFE!! I know!! (Super duper logic!) I'll cut myself and complain about it to everyone I know all the fucking time like the crybaby I am! Then I'll constantly talk about suicide to get my way and make people sorry for me!! #SMARTESTLogicEVAHHHHHH!!! Fuckin baby you don't know the meaning of depression.
Commented Nov 11, 2014 by anonymous
All you fuckin emo crybaby cutters nowadays
Commented Nov 11, 2014 by anonymous
People like you is the reason....... Let me stop you right there retard. Get your ass back in English class. You're probably a dumb fucking mexican! Again I'll buy the widdle baby a gun. Sick off all these suicidal crybabies we have today.
Commented Nov 10, 2014 by anonymous
Once you learn what it's like then you can say something got me now shut up you prick
Commented Nov 8, 2014 by anonymous
This person just wants someone they can talk to and be understood, haven't you ever wanted that? People like you is the reason our world is such a mess.
Commented Nov 8, 2014 by anonymous
I'll buy the fucking gun you suicidal cry baby bitch.
Commented Nov 6, 2014 by anonymous
No one would ever forget you if you were gone. I know exactly where you are coming from though, I'm the weird girl at my school and a lot of people call me names a pick on me, but a lot of the time they probably don't even know they are hurting you. Don't change, just be yourself and if other people don't like you then that's their problem not yours. I don't know if your into music or not but I would recommend playing Brave by Sara Bareilles it has really helped me. Take care, I will be thinking about you :)
Commented Nov 6, 2014 by anonymous
Wow thank you my friend, that took guts to sat to a random suicidal stranger, but still. It does help to know one person cares, the people around me I swear wouldn't cares if I where gone, except maybe my mom, but everyone else would have forgotten I even existed after 4 weeks. As for the life getting better, I will take your word for it and try to wait, I am trying and fighting very hard to stay. I'm useing all I can all I have it seems it would be easier to give up but I am going to try. Thank you for caring I will remember you til my last days as the anon who cared about me,
Commented Nov 6, 2014 by anonymous
Thanks, I'm trying, no promises but I'm fighting.
Commented Nov 6, 2014 by anonymous
The Melvin's are playing 27 miles from my house in three weeks.
Commented Nov 5, 2014 by anonymous
Please, what ever you do, do not kill your self. I have never met you, and probably never will, but I CARE ABOUT YOU, life is an amazing thing and once it's gone, it's gone you can never get it back. Right now it may seem that no one cares and one one likes you but there is at lest one person out there that for sure does, if you killed yourself every one around your would be deviated! Hold on, life gets better, it could be just around the next corner, but if you stop just before getting there you have lost everything. I have been threw the same thing many times before, I know how you feel and I CARE ABOUT YOU!
Commented Nov 5, 2014 by anonymous
Suicide is not the answer. Hang in there friend
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
Yeah Nirvana was a good band, no denying that. But they were no Melvins.
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
Oh my gosh your right that is a Nirvana song!! I tottally had forgotten that when I was writing this,, I actually am a fan of nirvana., i like pen cap chew and in bloom and silver best.
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
Great Nirvana song!
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
Wow, this is sad and desperate, but not hopeless. Hang in there young lady.
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
Firstly it's God, secondly it's fucking, third it's your, what you put was you're it's the abbreviation for 'you are' so what you said was " stab you are self" YOU'RE an idiot that is the proper way to use that .
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
Lol
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
I'm a passifist I've never even held a gun. But yes, it probably would work better than the pills, and would be quicker.
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
You commit suicide, or better yet, actually go through some real pain or depression, for more than just one sad afternoon, be depressed for six months straight where you can't even fucking eat or get out of bed because you are practically dead because you've lost the ability to function daily. Then come back and maybe you will have grown some compassion because you understAnd and don't just judge.
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
There are a lot of us that are hurting don't listen to the jerk head that replyed meanly to you. Hold on man.
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
You can fuck off and die. And learn to spell you little bitch.
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
I'm not on booze or drugs, I've never drank a day in my life. And I've been clean from drugs for over a year now thank you very much.
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
Thank you. Just. Thank you
Commented Nov 4, 2014 by anonymous
You need to get off the booze and or drugs, go to AA or NA and ask for help there are many others like you who have recovered.
Commented Nov 3, 2014 by anonymous
Shut up plz commit suicide you worthless shit
Commented Nov 3, 2014 by anonymous
Finally! Someone else like me!
Commented Nov 3, 2014 by anonymous
Oh my god, plz shut the fuck up and fucken stab you're self to death
Commented Nov 3, 2014 by anonymous
If you're actually serious- don't keep hurting yourself, it doesn't solve anything. I self medicated with alcohol for a long time, and while it does make the pain go away temporarily, when the effects wear off all your problems are still there. I'm not anti-drug or even anti-cutting yourself, but their are health risks involved for both, you'll regret giving yourself scars when you're older, and, I repeat, they aren't going to solve your problems. Fitting in is difficult and not everyone is able to do it easily- but it's not your fault, it's just how life works. Sometimes it takes a very long time for problems to sort themselves out- it doesn't just all get fixed in a day. However, if you have a roof over your head, food in your belly, and one or two people who love you, you're going to be okay for the time being, even if it doesn't feel that way (trust me, I know). Try to focus on what you can do to make your life a little better rather than letting all the problems in your life- big and small- overwhelm you and make you feel helpless. If you don't want to talk to a pastor, don't. My advice would be to make a list of all the things in your life that are causing you anxiety, decide which issues are most important, and think about how to deal with them so that you can minimize the amount of distress and disruption they cause you.
Commented Nov 3, 2014 by anonymous
Pro tip^
Commented Nov 3, 2014 by anonymous
Poor tip: Pills are for pussies.A bullet to the skull should do the trick!