Comic Relief
Posted Mar 2, 2011 by anonymous | 135 views | 0 comments
Surefire Ways To Know You're A Woman... > > When asked 'Is something bothering you?' reply 'no' then get pissed off when you are believed. > Become attracted to someone because he is outgoing and loves parties, start dating him, and immediately expect him to stop this behavior. > Always take an hour longer than promised to prepare for the evening. > Whine > If you are trying to sleep, it's because you're exhausted from your almost superhuman level of daily achievement; if he is trying to sleep it's because he is lazy. > No matter what the activity, he doesn't do it as well as a past boyfriend. > If he pays attention to you, he is smothering you. > If he gives you space, he is ignoring you. > Complain > Hate any bar he likes > Demand to be treated as an equal in everything - except when paying for meals, > airplane tickets, concerts, beers, clothes, etc. - these are required gifts proving his love. > Declare PMS at any given time. If he is knowledgeable about your cycle, tell him you're irregular from all the stress of your life. > Make his life miserable by making him feel guilty about doing anything other than catering to your needs. > Break into tears for no apparent reason. > Ask for help in some endeavor then become livid when it is given. > Insinuate yourself into your boyfriend's group of friends, break up with him, then make sure you are present at every gathering for the next month just to rub it in. WELL DAMN... I swear I didn't write this
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