Find out the Real reason women are cheating as much as men Women's relationships today, are following a very predictable pattern: They push men for commitment They get what they want They lose interest in sex They become attracted to someone else They start cheating They become angry and resentful They begin telling their partners that they need time apart They blame their partners for everything...and eventually, after making their partners and everyone else around them miserable for an indefinite, but usually, a long period of time...they end their relationships or marriages. If you're a male, like most other males, you would probably never suspect that your partner is cheating, not only because of your wife's or girlfriend's seeming disinterest in sex, but also because you have the naive belief that your wife or girlfriend is a “good girl.” Unfortunately, males are frequently left/divorced by their wives and girlfriends without ever knowing about their wives' and girlfriends' infidelities. If you're a female, like most other females, prior to cheating on your partner you always proclaimed yourself to be 'not the type' who would ever cheat. However, also like most other females, after they have cheated, you're shocked and appalled by your behavior, but at the same time you can't stop cheating. Women's relationships and marriages will continue to follow this same pattern unless (a) males develop an accurate understanding of females ─ particularly in regard to their sexuality and (b) females develop an accurate understanding of themselves ─ particularly in regard to their sexuality. After researching women's sexuality for more than ten years, I can honestly say that most of our societal beliefs about females are grossly distorted and many are completely erroneous. In the last year, the media has finally begun to acknowledge, albeit to a small degree, the widespread problem of female infidelity. Recently, several books and articles have attempted to explain why women are now cheating as much as men. However, none were successful in their attempt. All of them left out very important pieces to this extremely complicated puzzle. I believe the majority were simply unable to find all of the information necessary to figure out the problem. Although, I'm certain that some were just afraid to disclose certain key pieces of information because the truth, quite frankly, is so contrary to our current beliefs. Unfortunately, without these missing pieces, it's impossible to understand, and to subsequently fix, the real problem occurring in relationships today. My story: Shortly after my 27th birthday, I began to feel very different. I had been happily married for 4 years and then suddenly, out of nowhere, I began feeling bored and unhappy. In an attempt to figure out what was causing my unhappiness, I looked for answers in books, tried to talk my Mother and eventually went to see a psychologist. All of the information I received attributed the way I was feeling to my husband and similar to the majority of women, I began to view my husband as the culprit, too. Currently, women are initiating 70 - 75% of all divorces Later, through my own research, I discovered that what I was experiencing was quite normal. In fact, women are the most likely to divorce in their late twenties and thirties after an average of 4 years of marriage due to biological and psychological changes which occur at or around this age. The 'stages' that women often experience during the course of their long-term relationships Several years into my research, I was able to identify distinctive patterns and behaviors in the women I interviewed. I categorized these into four separate “stages” that women often experience during the course of their long-term relationships. The stages begin with a loss of sexual desire. Stage1 At this stage, the women I interviewed said that they felt as though something was missing in their lives. They had all the things that they wanted—a home, a family, a great husband—but felt they should be happier. Over time, many of the women noticed a distinct loss of sexual desire; they reported that they were no longer interested in sex. They spent a great deal of energy trying to avoid physical contact with their husbands for fear it might lead to a sexual encounter. They frequently complained of physical ailments to avoid having sex and often tried to avoid going to bed at the same time as their husbands. They viewed sex as a job, not unlike doing the dishes or going to the grocery store. Some of the women claimed that when their husbands touched them, they felt violated; they said their bodies would freeze up and they would feel tightness in their chest and/or a sick feeling in their stomach. The majority of the women in Stage 1 felt there was something wrong with them, that they were in some way defective. They were also fearful that their disinterest in sex would cause their husbands to cheat, or worse yet, leave them. Stage 2 Women at Stage 2 experienced reawakened desire stimulated by encounters outside the marital relationship. Whether the new relationships involved sex or remained platonic, they were emotionally significant to these women. Many of the women had felt no sexual desire for a long time. Many experienced tremendous guilt and regret, regardless of whether their new relationships were sexual, merely emotional, or both. Most experienced what could be termed an identity crisis—even those who tried to put the experience behind them. Constant reminders were everywhere. They felt guilt when the topic of infidelity arose, whether in the media, in conversations with family and friends, or at home with their husbands. They could no longer express their prior disdain for infidelity without feeling like hypocrites. They felt as though they had lost a part of themselves. Reflecting society's belief that women are either “good” or “bad,” these women questioned their “good girl” status and felt that they might not be deserving of their husbands. Many tried to overcome feelings of guilt by becoming more attentive toward and appreciative of their husbands. However, over time the predominant reaction of a number of the women moved from appreciation to justification. In order to justify their continued desire for other men, they began to attribute those desires to needs that were not being met in the marriage, or to their husband's past behavior. Many became negative and sarcastic when speaking of their husbands and their marriages. In many cases, an extramarital affair soon followed. Stage 3 Women at Stage 3 were involved in affairs, ending affairs, or contemplating divorce. The women who were having affairs said that their feelings were unlike anything they'd experienced before. They felt “alive” again and many believed that they had found their soul mates. These women were experiencing feelings associated with a chemically altered state, or what we typically refer to as being in love. These women also talked of being in tremendous pain, the pain of choosing between their husbands and their new love interests. They believed that what they were doing was wrong and unfair to their husbands, but were unable to end their affairs. Many tried several times. Prior to meeting with their lovers, they would vow that this would be the last time, but were unable to stick with their decisions. Unable to end their extramarital relationships, the women concluded that their lovers were soul mates. Unaware that they had become addicted to the high caused by chemicals released during the initial stages of a relationship, they were unable to choose. Many lived in a state of limbo for years. “Should I stay married or should I get a divorce?” was the question continuously on their minds. Some of the women attempted to initiate separations. In most cases, their husbands launched futile attempts to make their wives happy by being more attentive, spending more time at home and helping out around the house. Regardless of these women's past and present complaints, the last thing they wanted was to spend more time with their husbands. Many women successfully gained separations. The reason many gave for separating was a “search for self.” They convinced their husbands that they might be able to save the marriage if they could just have time to themselves. They continued to tell their husbands that time apart was the only hope of improving the current situation. Several of these women said they wanted to free themselves of the restrictions of marriage and spend more time with their lovers. Most thought that eventually their confusion would disappear and they would know with certainty that they either wanted to stay married or get divorced in order to be with their lovers. By separating, these women were able to enjoy the high experienced with their new partners without letting go of the security of their marriages. The husbands were still unaware that their wives were having affairs. Their lack of suspicion was due in part to their wife's disinterest in sex and their belief that she was a “good girl.” Several women at this stage were ending an extramarital affair. In most cases, it was not their decision. The majority were involved with single men who either lost interest because the relationship could not progress or were attracted to other women who were, in most cases, single. The women whose affairs were ending experienced extreme grief, became deeply depressed and expressed tremendous anger toward their husbands. Unaware that they were experiencing chemical withdrawal due to sudden changes in brain chemistry, many felt that they had missed their chance at happiness due to their own indecisiveness. However, these women did not return to their husbands, at least not emotionally. Believing they had become more aware of what they wanted and needed from a mate, many placed the utmost importance on finding a relationship that gave them the feeling they experienced in their affairs. To these women a new relationship with a new partner represented a clean slate, a chance to regain their “good girl” status. Some searched for new partners during their separations. Others returned to their marriages, but still continued to search. Some women resumed sporadic sexual relations with their husbands in an effort to safeguard the marriage until they made a decision. Although most were not sexually attracted to their husbands, desire was temporarily rekindled when they suspected their husbands were unfaithful, were contemplating infidelity, or when their husbands showed signs of moving on. Stage 4 The women in stage four included those who chose to stay married and continue their affairs and those who chose to divorce. Some of the women who continued their affairs stated that marital sex was improved by maintaining the extramarital relationship. Some thought the lover was a soul mate, but for one reason or another did not leave their husband and did not feel torn between the two. Others realized that their feelings were intensified by not sharing day-to-day living arrangements with their lover. Almost all of the women in this latter category were having affairs with married men. They believed their affairs could continue indefinitely without disrupting either partner's primary relationship. The women who chose divorce and were in the beginning stages of a new relationship typically expressed relief at having finally made a decision and reported feeling normal again. Many of the divorced women who had remarried and were several years into their new marriages seemed somewhat reluctant to talk about the specifics of their past experiences. However, they did mention feelings of guilt and regret for having hurt their children and ex-spouses only to find themselves experiencing similar feelings in the new relationship. Female infidelity will not only continue to be extremely common, but it will also continue to be on the rise. In fact, today, many men are unknowingly playing a game of Russian roulette in their relationships with women women's infidelity Women are cheating and relationships are ending because men and women lack necessary information. Today's relationship problems are not only solvable, but many can be easily solved ─ once you understand what the real problem is. The information in Women's Infidelity should be common knowledge to couples, both married and unmarried, and to dating males and females ─ trying to have a relationship without the information in this book is like to trying to read without knowing the letters of the alphabet. Reviews and Letters From Readers: 'I have been reading your book all week and have found it to be completely insightful and clarifying. I have been married for 7 years and have a 3 year old at home. I have not engaged in an affair but over the last few months have definitely considered looking for it... Thank you for sharing your wisdom. I feel clearer now than I have for a long time. I know my whole family is going to benefit from this information.' ─ Katie Little '...chapter[2], alone, is worth the $17.95 US cover price...what is here is impressive...' ─ Donna Dillman, GRIP Magazine 'I heard you on the radio and I thought you may have some answers for me since I had just caught my wife cheating. I was wondering why this was happening so I ordered your book. I received your book the other day and read it cover to cover in about 4 hours. I was amazed. It seemed to be written about my marriage.' ─Tom Brickner, Los Angeles 'I just happened across your website today and what I've found is truly enlightening. As a psychologist I did have occasion to study marriage and marriage counseling to some degree but my primary interest has always been in working with children and adolescents. Clearly there is a significant absence of information such as yours being disseminated to graduating psychologists in training. Having been down the marital breakup path, I can also clearly attest to the accuracy of your conclusions...I do thank-you for writing such an insightful and informative book and will share it with my numerous friends who are currently experiencing similar marital challenges, as well as some of my professional colleagues who are more directly involved in working with couples.' ─ Dr. D Women's Infidelity explains: Why females push males for commitment Why secrecy and lies have always played an important role in female sexuality Why in the past it was important for females to believe that they were naturally monogamous AND why it was important for males to think so too Why and how women pursue and discard men Why females pretend NOT to have orgasms when they really do Why women lose sexual desire for their husbands Why women cheat Why women are more likely than men to become addicted to the sex in their affairs Why it's impossible to make women happy Why women refuse to say what they want Why women like getting married, but not being married Why marriage and fidelity can actually be MORE difficult for women than it is for men Why women overwhelmingly initiate the majority of all divorces - even when they're married to men who love and treat them well And finally, why and how men make the problem worse by doing exactly the opposite of what they need to do in order to fix the problem When I decided to write Women's Infidelity, my intentions were not to write a salacious book. I simply wanted to write a book about women that was honest and easy to understand. I knew the book would be highly controversial because rarely, if ever, does anyone speak truthfully about women, particularly when it comes to sex. However, it appears people are ready to hear the truth, because the response to Women's Infidelity has been overwhelmingly positive ─ much more so than I ever would have imagined. I've been interviewed on radio stations across the country and I regularly receive letters and emails from men and women thanking me for writing the book. When I began searching for answers, it wasn't uncommon for me to find as little as one or two paragraphs of pertinent information in a three hundred page book. So, I know how frustrating and disappointing it is to look for answers and not be able to find them. I promise you ─ after reading Women's Infidelity, you will know exactly what's happening in relationships today, you will also know why it's happening and what you can do to fix the problem. I've devoted a tremendous amount of time to unraveling this mystery and in less than three or four hours you can find out what it took me almost a decade to learn. ─ Michelle Langley Click here to get information about ordering Michelle Langley's groundbreaking book, Women's Infidelity: Living In Limbo: What Women Really Mean When They Say' 'I'm Not Happy' If You Have Questions About Ordering Contact Us And You Will Receive A Reply Within 24 Hrs.