
cheated
Posted Mar 2, 2011 by anonymous | 81 views | 0 comments
I waited 22 years to become sexually intimate with anyone. I dated a lot of guys but always dumped them because they were not the BEST. Finally I found a guy who in the end was a fraud but at the time was Perfecto! I gave him everything - even my virginity which I wanted to give to my husband. He cheated on me when he went home to Peru with an ex and a waitress at a sex house. He didn't tell me for over a year- well after I broke up with him because I felt something wrong... I went with my gut. So how could a guy cheat on what he even says is the best thing to ever happen to him? How could a guy cheat on me? I thought I was pretty, intelligent, fun... I never thought it could happen to me.. I always told him he was funny, beautiful, smart... I always gave him affection and attention without chasing him. I thought I found that balance. His excuse is that he wanted to see what it was like to cheat and he hated it.. he said he'd never do again to another girl... YET WHY ME??? He could have done it to a girl who sleeps around too! but me... I am not even close to that! It would hurt me more.. didn't he see that? Can I ever trust again? I mean I can't imagine trusting again. How could he look at me for over a year knowing he had done that to me? He said he is a coward but I know he is worse. There is no way to explain the feeling of dishonor, shame, hurt, pain, abandonment, unattractiveness...
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