Is your partner a sociopath? You may not know how to tell, but even worse, you may be thinking that you are the crazy one. Sociopaths' minds don't work like yours or mine, yet they feel perfectly confident about what they are doing. Something is clearly wrong, and we often question our own sanity. So what is a sociopath? A serial killer that strolls from one victim to another? Possibly, but not often. Ask yourself this: is your partner unable to form any kind of emotional bond with another person? Does he or she seem to be always without empathy for others, even their own family? Does he or she do things that to you seem beyond comprehension; and then carry on as if those actions made no difference? Is he or she in trouble with the law and other authorities? Does he or she like dangerous, outrageous or socially/sexually unacceptable activities that provide a thrill? If you see this dynamic in your partner, family member, coworker, or friend, you are very probably dealing with a sociopath. One thing you should not expect in a sociopath is intense emotion. Among the many people I help, some think their partner is sociopathic. but they recount that their partners are sometimes intensely angered by anything that seems to suggest that he or she might have a flaw. In this mode, they will do anything, including brutalizing their own family, to maintain their own feeling that others see them as without any flaws. Disordered people can't deal with the reality of their behaviors. Sociopaths distort the truth to serve their own diseased motivations (In contrast borderlines and narcissists distort reality to protect themselves from the pain of accepting a major flaw in themselves.) Sociopaths lie without compunction to achieve their goals. Moreover, they have no concern for our well-being, and happily manipulated circumstances so that we suffer for their actions. After a while it becomes hard to distinguish what is real from what is being distorted. We begin to doubt our reality and question whether we're the crazy ones, or whether our disordered SO's (significant others) are really right about what they say. The truth is, THEY'RE NOT RIGHT. But as sociopaths, they just don't care. What's more, disordered people hide their problems very effectively. Sociopaths are intensely manipulative. Their emotionally empty lives lead them to spend their energy creating distortions to serve their needs. They may develop a strong reputation as good people, yet in private they may be intensely hurtful. But those around us don't see it, causing us further confusion. Unlike borderlines or narcissists who have periods of remorse, deep regret and shame for their extreme behavior, sociopaths don't ever care how others are impacted. During periods of extreme agitation, borderlines and narcissists are consumed by the intensity of their fears, and their actions show no empathy or concern. Like people panicked and trying to escape a burning theater, they trample others without care. For this reason, people may think them to be sociopathic. The difference is that narcissists and borderlines at other times will feel regret, remorse, and compassion. Sociopaths will never feel these feelings. For sociopaths, these functions of the brain simply seem to be gone. Sociopaths are not troubled by their disconnect from others or from societal norms. They don't perceive a problem, and so they reject the idea that they are ill. Thus, the few sociopaths who do enter mental health treatment almost all lack the primary characteristic necessary for improvement: a commitment to change. They reject the treatment process and disengage. Prospects for improvement in true sociopaths are not good.